Bolivia's Day of Love and Friendship
(Santa Cruz de la Sierra, Bolivia)
On Bolivia's Day of Love and Friendship (Dia del Amor y Amistad) I challenge you to seriously question both. If your first reaction to this statement is "huh?!" here's what I mean by that...
There are so many ways to love a person and as many ways to express love and caring as there are people on our planet. But sometimes maybe we need to ask ourselves, not how many more people we can love, and not how much more deeply we can love the people who are already in our lives, but how we can love them better.
It may not be enough to simply believe we love a person. It may not be enough to express that love to them in every way we know how. Each of us has our own way of showing love and caring. And sometimes it's risky, sometimes it's hurtful, sometimes the love we share is not returned in the ways we hope it will be.
Someone once said, "just because someone doesn't love you in the way you want them to doesn't mean they aren't loving you with all they've got" and that may apply to us as well. We may love the people in our lives in every way possible and still not get through to them. At times like this, maybe we should not question why they don't understand, accept or respond to our efforts.
Maybe there are times when we need to ask the people we love "how can I love you better?"
The risk, of course, is that we also have to accept their answer to that question and it may not be the answer we would like to hear. They may ask us to love them in ways we are unfamiliar with, in which case we can only make an effort. They may ask us to love them in ways that are unhealthy for ourselves, in which case we have a difficult decision to make, because loving oneself is just as important as loving someone else. At times, sadly, they may even ask us to love them less. And part of loving a person deeply may also mean doing that for them because it's what they most want or need at the time.
No one who loves ever really loses. There is nothing but gain in loving someone enough to love them in the truthful ways they need you to do so. Even if it means learning new ways to love, understand or accept them... even if it means risking more... even if it means loving them enough to take a step back and be only what they need.
So today, on Bolivia's first day of spring and Dia del Amor y Amistad, have faith and be unafraid. Question love and friendship and ask "how can I love you better?"